textpostsandcats:

being a pizza delivery driver is great because literally no one is disappointed to see you

windayy:

If you are using the term “autistic” as an insult, get as far away from me as humanly possible, you asshole. You piece of shit.

gurlfriend:happy fathers day
bf:but im not a dad
gf::)

postllimit:

why iphones gotta take two million years to turn back on after they die like you plug em in and you’re all ready to start texting again but they’re like “nope. i gotta take some time for myself. figure out who i am. you hurt me too much the last time. let me think.”

notchicken:

*releases 420 cows into a field* hahahaha graze it

crunchier:

4am is the new 10pm

WiFi:connected
Me:then fucking act like it
foie:

thecutestofthecute:

My friend saw on Animal Planet that Golden Retriever’s mouths are so soft they can carry eggs without breaking them, so she tested it. 

I am tearing up

foie:

thecutestofthecute:

My friend saw on Animal Planet that Golden Retriever’s mouths are so soft they can carry eggs without breaking them, so she tested it. 

I am tearing up

xxcactusdudexx:

can’t wait for fall to start so i can stop wearing the same two pairs of shorts all the time and start wearing the same two pairs of jeans all the time

relatable post

softvillage:

when you drain the water from the bathtub and it makes the scary tornado

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